


Pun-ishment

by DrekkDeina



Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Comedy, Drabble, F/M, Fun, Hilarity, One-Shot, Terrible Jokes, pawful puns, puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-19
Updated: 2019-03-19
Packaged: 2019-11-24 19:52:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18169346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrekkDeina/pseuds/DrekkDeina
Summary: A short, sweet, and pawsibly salty little one shot about Nick getting a little too punny with his partner.





	Pun-ishment

**Author's Note:**

> I was having fun just typing out a punny little drabble of Nick and Judy having a very... strange conversation. This is actually based upon a conversation I had with my best friend/girlfriend recently. While not verbatim... it is about 90% accurate with a few nuts thrown on top.
> 
> I'm not used to throwing stuff this short out there so have a good laugh but this isnt the start or tease of something else. XD
> 
> Read, enjoy, and grab the strange snack. Mine today is an assortment of soda flavored taffy. Loving the Dr. Pepper one.

"You make puns sporadically throughout the day… but I wonder for how long can you do it constantly," came the curious musing of a grey rabbit doe, giving her red tod partner a disconcerting glare.

Nick had been doing more than the usual dose of jokes that day, subjecting Judy to a feeling of intense irritation. Both at how clever they sort of were… and how terribly timed they were.

"I could tango all day, sweetheart," the fox remarked easily, examining his claws in a dramatic manner.

"Really?"

"Af-fur-mative."

"Was that one just now?"

"Actually it was number two."

"Ugh… are we really doing this now?"

"When else would we do it? The future?"

"Forget it… are you hungry?"

"No, I'm Nick…"

"That's not what I meant and you know it!" The doe exclaimed.

"What's this about a mint?" Came the fox's reply.

"That's not even a pun!"

"It's punderful! Puntacular! I can keep going."

Judy groaned, "Please don't. There's just too much cheesy going around."

"Is that why they make them into wheels?" Nick asked in what seemed to be a truly curious tone.

"Gosh darn it!" She griped hopelessly. "I can't believe you…"

"You butter believe it," he started, barely containing a grin and the laughter that could come with it. "When it comes to cheese, I'm the brie's knees. I'm gouda at it. I'm sharp like cheddar. Want me to keep going? Or are you a little too bleu for me to continue?"

"I hate you…" the doe remarked in a deadpan tone, eyes level and lips in a flat line.

"Awww I love you, too, Fluff," Nick offered in kind, giving the grumpy rabbit a peck on the cheek.

She simply grumbled and blushed.

"Can I ask you something though?" He continued.

The bunny nodded reluctantly.

"Is this just becoming pun-ishing for you?"

"Ugh… I give up! I'm done!"

"Done? Were you getting baked? Oh! So you're now a carrot cake?" The fox rapid fired the questions.

"You gonna make an innuendo about putting frosting on me now?" Judy sassed with a hint of annoyance in her voice.

"Nah… you're already sweet enough," Nick rebuked softly, his tone being much to smooth for her to not take it sincerely, causing a pervasive blush to fill her cheeks and ears.

"I feel like you've prepared for this at some point…"

"Almost every day… as if that weren't a-pun-dantly clear."

"Oh my goodness. Cheese and rice, Slick. You're going to be the death of me."

"I would just give you the kiss of life…" the fox mentioned, puckering his lips comically.

Shoving his snout aside, the bunny doe giggled and fired back, "No need. Your puns could wake the dead."

"..."

"What…? No retort to that? Oh thank goodness. Finally!"

Nick's muzzle slowly spread in a devious grin.

Judy's face fell.

"No."

He laughed in a rising volume.

"No."

"So you mean to say…"

"Nuh uh…"

"...is that my puns could have…  _grave_ consequences?"

"I am so done…"

"I tell a few puns and Boom! Zombie apuncolypse."

The infuriated doe couldn't begin to point out all the wrongs in his line of thinking, resigning to grumble and facepaw herself.

"Oh come on! I'll dead-icate my next pun to zombodie special."

Nick was outright cackling at this point, only stopping to breath or vent another stupid joke.

"At least you're safe in such an event," the bunny tried to set him up.

"...because they eat brains?" he interjected without missing a beat. "Yeah… I lost that looooong ago."

"I can tell!" Judy exclaimed, finally giving in to the ridiculous nature of their conversation and beginning to giggle.

"It was giving me too much pain… in the rain, so I threw it down a drain…"

"Okay okay! I give up… you win…" the grey rabbit told him, gripping his muzzle to finally shut him up. "You can pun… or whatever that was… for a really really long time."

Nick smirked beneath her paws, emerald eyes settling on gazing at her own.

"I'm glad we could come to a punderstanding," he mumbled with a growing snicker.

The rabbit doe released him, throwing her paws to the air and storming off in a huff.

"That's it! We're done here!" she complained, trying desperately to stifle the laugh that bled through her words, a smile evident on her muzzle.

The red fox tod followed her with a silent smirk, winking at her occasional glances and causing her ears to dip down in embarrassment.

**Author's Note:**

> Short and sweet, just like my girlfriend. Hopefully this read was fun while it lasted.
> 
> Until next time, It's been a hustle, Sweethearts!


End file.
